Letter: Ever-timely advice from Dear Abby

August 18, 2022

In cleaning out my files, I came across this ever-timely article by the late Abigail Van Buren. This “Dear Abby” article is dated April 5, 2013, and is as follows:

“Dear Abby, maybe you would like to pass this on to the parents of teenage boys. It worked for me when I had the sex talk with my sons. I knew their

brains had not yet fully developed. They thought they were invincible and had an ‘it could never happen to me attitude.

“Because money seems to be the one thing at that age they can relate to, I decided to turn it into a mathematical problem. I told them that if they got

a girl pregnant, they could figure on a minimum of $300 a month child support, multiplied by 12 months for 18 years. (That totals $65,000 — unless the girl has twins, which would double the amount.)

“Then I told them if they were tempted to have unprotected sex, they should look at the girl and ask themselves if they would pay her $65,000 to

have sex with them. If they couldn’t answer yes, then they needed to walk away.

“Abby, it worked! No grandchildren appeared until after they were married. Feel free to share this with other parents who would appreciate a ‘non-

traditional’ approach that is effective.” (Signed Tony, in San Diego).

According to Google, child support in 2022 is $1,081 a month, which is $12,978 a year.

Carola Lacy


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Bert Etling

Bert Etling

Bert Etling is the executive editor of Ashland.news. Email him at betling@ashland.news.

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