Strider likes getting old and evening walks at dusk, among other things

By Strider the Dog

Dear Strider,

I enjoy your column. I’m curious. Are you an old dog? You seem like you might be. If you are, do you have any thoughts about aging and how to handle it? We old humans can always use a dog’s perspective.

Gratefully yours,

— Ashland Geezer

Dear Geezer,

You’re only as old as you feel. So I will admit that on rainy and/or slushy days, I feel really really old. Especially that back left leg I kind of crunched up chasing trucks on the other side of the river at Strider Beach Where the Trucks Are Just Out of Reach. That was years ago, but I still feel it. Probably even more now.

But do I let it interfere with my joie de vivre? Not on your life! Aches and pains just go with the territory. And getting old isn’t so bad. I mean, consider the alternative.

Also, I have this theory. Especially watching Woody the Puppy intern. I notice that it takes him a considerable amount of time to get from point A to point B. He runs the gamut of the alphabet before he gets there, usually out of breath, wet and muddy. He’s forgotten what he meant to do by the time he does get to B. I, on the other hand, after years of strategic thought, just head straight for B from A, cool, calm and collected. Then I get on with more important things, like sniffing the ground where the bear recently stalked carrying some stuff away from our compost pile. Now that’s entertainment.

Makes it up to you for getting old, I think. You can get so much more interesting stuff done in the allotted time.

So, Geezer, let’s rock that allotment. Are you with me?

I know you are.

Dear Strider,

I was wondering if dogs notice the time changes when we go from Daylight Savings Time to Standard Time. You know, spring forward, fall back. Do you clock it? How do dogs feel about it? Or do you just pay no attention at all? I personally wish we could just pick a time and stick with it, but maybe that’s just me.

— Disgruntled Timekeeper

Dear Disgruntled,

You bet we notice it. Are you kidding? Meals and walks jump up an hour and back an hour, depending on the season. It’s insane. Maybe you can tell you’ve landed on one of my pet peeves. I mean, it took me years before I could figure out why all of a sudden my breakfast and dinner were an hour late, and my evening walks lost their standardized appeal. I remind Tod it’s time for my walk, and all of a sudden it isn’t. What’s the problem here?

I have yet to get a clear answer about why humans change the clocks. Whenever I ask, I get a kind of garbled, “Something something something, farmers.” But we live in the country, and I know rancher dogs, and they can’t figure it out any more than I can.

I don’t mind it getting dark earlier when we switch back from Daylight Saving Times to Standard Time. I like Standard Time. In the summer, it’s nice, and in the winter, I actually kind of like walking in the dusk, with a star or two coming out, before my dinner. Nothing wrong with the days getting longer and then shorter. That’s what days do. Why not just let them get on with it without interference? Just settle on one thing, for dog’s sake. Consistency, folks, consistency!

Who’s in charge of this, anyway?  Can we get our guardians to write someone about it? I’m in favor, Disgruntled. You lead, I’ll heel.

Glad to get that off my chest. Now excuse me, I’ve got to go howl at the moon.

Just kidding. Not really.

Got a pet peeve? Who better than a dog advice columnist to lavish on the sympathy? Just email [email protected].