Advice for a worried unicorn and an exasperated wife

By Strider the Dog

Dear Strider,

Everything seems so messed up right now. I keep worrying I’m not doing what I can. I call my representatives, state and federal, regularly. I work to get out the vote. I put on my inflatable unicorn costume and celebrate peace, love, justice, and understanding.

But it never seems to me like I’m doing enough.  I end up lying awake at night beating myself up, and trying to think of other ways to move the present unjust needle.

Any hints for me here?

— Unicorn Sluggard

Dear Unicorn,

Myself, I go by an act/relax schedule. First I act, and then I relax. When I have a lot of work ahead — sniffing, chasing the ball, walking the humans, mentoring the pups, that kind of thing — I check out what’s in front of me and then act in the best way I know how. Then I relax before acting again. For example, walking the humans, encouraging them to follow my energetic example by running up and down hills. After which, it’s relax mode. I throw myself down in a sunny spot somewhere and have a snooze. Soon it will be mealtime, and I’ll need to concentrate on action once more. After that — you guessed it — a nap is in order. Another walk at night, with maximum sniffing outside, always tough but meaningful work, and then, bedtime. I sleep well, knowing I’ve done the best I can with my day. Because nothing is more useless than worrying about things you can’t do. Worrying about doing your best with what’s in front of you is more than enough challenge for man and beast.

So that’s it. Just remember: Act. Relax. Repeat.

By the way, I love seeing anyone dressed up in animal costumes. Especially the unicorns.

Dear Strider,

I’m the person who wrote to you with the problem of a husband who wants to move to the city, while I’m happy here [Ask Strider 10/15/25]. You gave me some good advice, I thought, in suggesting that we try him moving up there for a couple of months, while I stay here, and then us both reassessing. Since he has a pal from his college days who just got a divorce and happens to be lonely, as well as having a spare room, I thought hub would jump at the chance. Hardly any rent! Boys hanging out together! Lots of talking over old times without worrying you’re boring the wife!

But no. Instead he’s sulking because I won’t go with him, even just for a couple of months. He moans about how he loves me too much and doesn’t want to be parted for so long. I can’t help suspecting this has something to do with the fact that he and college bud lived on nothing but cheese sandwiches and granola when they were on their own.  I have this feeling hub’s pal still lives on that now that he’s divorced. I pointed out that the big city is chock full of restaurants and food trucks, but that hasn’t stopped the grousing.

How do I get him to stop this endless complaining?

— Still Loving It Here

Dear Still,

I hear you, totally get the scenario. The puppy does something similar when I’m having a wonderful time lying in a nice shady spot on the meadow while chewing on a meaty marrowbone. He sidles up to me and commences whining that he doesn’t have a bone of his own. He hopes this will spoil my peace, and my own present contentment, so that I’ll let him have the bone without his having to do the work to find one for himself.

So I just give him a long look and say,  “Get a life, dude,” before going back to enjoying myself.

I suggest you implement a version of same. Adapted to your situation and needs, of course.

Good luck.

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